myself to healing and teaching and writing about hypnotherapy.
My life is dedicated to helping others through hypnotherapy.
I got into this because hypnotherapy saved my life when
western medicine and psychotherapy hadn't helped me
and I didn't have anywhere else to turn. I was doing
fairly well, both physically and emotionally and feeling
good about my life, especially being able to help so
many people, when all of a sudden, things turned bad.
of things happened to me during the past year of 2003,
tragic things which tried my faith, and the return of
personal illness that I thought I was rid of forever.
In January, 2003, my sweet dog, Sweetsiepootsy had
to be put down because of cancer. Pootsie was more
than just a pet. She was my Clinical Associate and
was featured on my website. She would greet my clients
at the door and usher them into my healing room, where
she would bring them a toy to relieve their nervousness.
When I put the client into hypnosis, Pootsie would
also go into hypnosis and then when I brought the
client out, Pootsie would greet them as they awakened.
She had such a warm heart and I loved her dearly.
In March, my sister Jean died of a heart attack. Jean
and I were always close. She was a Nanny and loved
to take care of little kids. I took care of Jean for
the last 20 years of her life because she could not
make that much in the Nanny business. She was my connection
to the past because she and I shared so much growing
up. She and I practically raised my brother Bill because
my mother was working.
In April, my son-in-law committed suicide. Richard
was very much like me. He was depressed from childhood,
felt very insecure and, like me, linked security to
the amount of money he had. Richard was very gifted
mechanically and was a US Airways Senior Captain.
When the airline went bankrupt, Richard lost most
of his retirement, which meant so much to him, and
he killed himself.
In May, my only son died after surgery for an aneurysm
on his heart's aortic valve. The aneurysm was imbedded
into his sternum and when the surgeon opened his chest,
he cut the aneurysm and nothing could stop the bleeding.
Charlie loved life and was doing very well as a CPA
and he had a good job and wonderful family.
in three months, six of my eight grandchildren had no
father and I had lost my sister, son and son in law.
This is a lot of stress. Going to three family funerals
in three months does not inure you to death. Instead,
it brings death right into your face, full force.
a past history of high blood pressure, and a sleep problem
caused by two surgeries that left me with scar tissue
which irritated the sciatic nerve going to my feet and
caused stabbing pains in my feet at night when I tried
to sleep. Hypnotherapy and mild blood pressure medication
took care of these problems for me, and I led a normal
life and did my work. I was okay with my blood pressure
and sleep during and after the family deaths until about
mid November when my blood pressure began to rise with
increasing speed. With the approval of my allopathic
physician, I increased my blood pressure medication
to compensate. Two weeks later, I went to the hospital
emergency room because my blood pressure was up to 210/105.
My blood pressure soon reached 220/120, and I was in
the hospital ER five times between December and March.
This happened despite taking seven powerful blood pressure
with allopathic medicine, psychiatry, hypnotherapy,
psychological counseling, herbal medicine and shamanic
healing without any success in reducing my blood pressure.
I really thought I was going to die from a stroke. Nothing
that my doctors suggested had any effect on my blood
pressure. It was consistently very high and I was scared
that I this was it for me. I lived with the Sword of
Damocles hanging over my head all the time and I could
not get out from under it. I began to cancel clients
and students, and prepared myself for death. How could
I help others or teach them about healing when I was
about to die? I had no idea of what to do about it.
with an Ayurvedic associate and determined that I was
full of rage over what had happened to me during the
year. This rage was causing my high blood pressure.
But, how could I translate this knowledge into something
concrete that would lower my blood pressure? As usual,
I didn't know what to do about the problem. But, I didn't
have to worry; the Creator (Spirit) did it for me… again.
is how Spirit works. If we don't get the message from
our life lessons, then Spirit will keep creating bigger
and bigger lessons for us until we finally do get it.
It is the hard way to learn. All my life, I have always
been cursed to learn my lessons the hard way. Unfortunately,
that's the way I constantly do it. I never learn until
it is shoved into my face time after time. It's stupid
and really unnecessary, but there are those of us who
are too dumb to learn any other way. We, who are dumb,
are condemned to learn life's lessons the hard way.
is how I learned. All my life I had been afraid of death.
The fear came to me when I was in my mother's womb and
I had never been free of it. The lessons of my family's
deaths were Spirit's way of teaching me to accept death
as a part of life. But I resisted because I was so afraid,
and so Spirit drove it home to me in this very hard
way by making me face death repeatedly. The fear in
me combined with the rage I felt towards learning this
hard way drove my blood pressure up. I could not get
this fear and rage out of me to lower the internal pressure.
Pootsie died we got a new little dog who we named Daisy.
We got her when she was eleven weeks old. She really
grew on us, especially me. She was a little eleven-pound
Shih Tzu who I had grown to love and who loved me. She
was about sixteen months old and we had a special relationship.
I loved the way she would cock her little head and growl
at me when she wanted something. I loved the way she
would put her little head on my shoulder when I was
sitting on the floor with my back to the couch eating
something. She was very precious to me and occupied
an especially warm place in my heart.
remodeling parts of the house and the workers had arrived
early that morning. Daisy, who had slept with me, was
hugging me in bed. I left the door open so she could
leave whenever she wanted. I hadn't noticed that she
had left until I heard my wife screaming. I leaped out
of bed full of foreboding and found out what had happened.
Daisy had gone out of the house through her doggie door
and had been run over and killed in the driveway by
one of the workmen. When I heard this, I felt like I
exploded. I shrieked and cried and screamed for over
one hour. I could not control the outpouring of emotion
from within me. When I finished, my blood pressure was
better. Daisy, in dying, had saved me by providing me
with the safety valve that vented my internal pressure.
my blood pressure is improved, but I have no Daisy.
I have replaced pressure with grief - a hard way to
resolve my blood pressure problem. Is it really necessary
that learning be so hard? I think that Spirit works
like this if we don't do what it is necessary to correct
our lives. If we just go on muddling through life's
problems without resolving them, than this is the way
we learn. I think that Spirit wants us to use our minds
to come up with our own solutions to life's problems
because that's a good way to learn. If we don't solve
our problems, then they will be solved for us and we
may not like how it is done. Remember the old adage
"Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it".
just wish that the problem is solved for us without
doing it ourselves, then we leave the problem to Spirit
and it might be a hard solution. We should not just
leave the solution to our problems to the Universe or
Spirit; we should solve our problems in the way we want
them to be solved. Otherwise the solutions may be taken
out of our hands. This is very elegant because we learn
and grow by taking responsibility even though it is
much more work. But that's why we have minds. Our minds
can often lead us to a problem's solution that is much
easier and acceptable to us than if we just leave it
to Spirit. Perhaps this is Spirit's way to get us to
get off our duffs and make us learn.
if we go the hard way a sufficient amount, we finally
say "enough" and try to learn an easier way. It's not
that Spirit wants us to suffer; it's just that, unfortunately,
many of us only learn that way …we have to suffer enough
first and then we begin to get a little smart. If we
are lucky, this happens when we are fairly young. But
then there are those of us who don't get the message
until we are pretty far over the hill. It's the story
of the jackass who had to be hit over the head with
a two-by-four to get his attention. I am that jackass,
and I am telling Spirit now that, yes, I have finally
gotten the message. I will solve my problems. You don't
have to do it for me. Amen!